it's 5am again

haiz... do i deserve this?? do i really have to become like this?? please save me lar !! it's the 2nd day i can't sleep til 5am... and it's the 2nd day after i saw that message... is it really hard to forget someone?? maybe i just accepted too many advices... work hard you'll see the changes, hope can be created by yourself lar, and... aiya !! just too many opinions was given to me lar... i'm so lost... everyone say, forget her lar... move on lar... if that's so easy.... i would've be someone cold blooded?? i duno lar, it's just so hard to control this feeling thinge of mine...

the past 2 days... i thought back what i've been through.... can it be a dream?? could it be just a dream to me?? but sad to say, even if it's a dream... i remembered it so clearly... every scene, every sentence said and every emotions i had... and every moment that i treasured... i also duno why i always regret something after i've lost it... i seriously duno how to appreciate those chances and those days i had... it's just so hard to imagine why am i so weak... what was i thinking when i have those chances.... what was i doing when i have those days... gosh... to think back... i'm seriously 100% retarded as the quiz stated...

i couldn't even accept a fact that's already happened... what else could i say bout myself??

i ain't myself anymore...