the biggest decision i made

after schooling days ~ after spm ~ after genting ~ after prom ~
i've made a big decision today...
after all that, i notice i'm not mature enough, i'm typing all this now also showed that i'm not mature enough... haha... i'm accepting all the advises from my friends... it's time to make such a decision... and here, i'm gonna say all the truth... out of so many friends... there's only 3 ppl that really support me loving her... others all dun support me... i'm not gonna disappoint the 3 friends of mine.... but i guess i need more time... the me now is someone who really duno how to talk, how to express, and how to care bout the others... everytime need everyone to help me to solve my problems... i can never solve it on my own...

everytime we hang out i also need other ppl to fetch me or help me in my transport... i'm always the one who troubles other people with my own problem... and i also emo... i duno how to take care myself and love myself... i shouldn't attempt to take care or even love other people yet...

i can never know how to treat ppl nice, everytime i only know how to make ppl angry and scold me like some hell... i think i'm still not someone that can really take care of her... but i wanted to let her know that i really love her... but for now... i'll try my hardest to make everything done first... i will try my best to let her know that i love her.... but wait until more stable first lah =) same sentence again, i really wish my first to be my last.... this is the first time i felt my heart so pain blogging... it's like i'm killing my heart >.< haiz.... i really dun wish to end this love.... i wan an endless love... haha...

after spm, i'm feeling down
after genting, i'm feeling even down
after prom, i'm feeling the worst...

i stayed in love but i will limit myself... most emo songs i ever heard is playing on my blog =)