a small gathering of us was held on 8th may, 8pm~11pm at kayu... =) had our chats and dinner there... it's fun sometimes.... when you get to put all your studies away, and chat happily with your friends...
it's a night of thoughts... i'm thinking bout form 6s, ns, college, courses, transport, staying, results, or rather future... it's not a simple choice to make... unless you have your further path already, which no matter how's your result, it won't affects your life... if everything is so easy, i wouldn't have to think so much... you think it's something like
- go form 6 lah.... since you duno what to take
- stay outside only lar... if everyday transport ma fan
- drive only lar... not like you dunno
the main thing is.... if stay outside, the cost of living and burden will be increased... if drive, currently i have no extra car, even if i have, need to consider the petrol, tol, road tax, and my safety.... if everything was perfectly planned, i wouldn't have to think at all... although it's not as complicated as i say, but it's not as simple as what you think... after a deep thought... hmm... i somehow... decided to choose the 2nd option... which is ns first then college or college then ns... form 6 no longer available in the options... know why?? because i've thought it through... lolz...
the reason i'll take form 6 at the beginning was, i'm able to see her everyday? i can go for ns while waiting for stpm? yup, everything was that simple in my simplified mind... after listen to various advices... studying isn't something that really like having fun with friends... so, dun like, oh you go there?? then i go there... oh you wanna take this?? then i take this also lar... hmm... we'll need to make a big decision in our life which might affect our whole life... yes, if i go form 6 i can see her everyday.... but then so?? it doesn't give her any hapiness seeing me everyday, or like... if i'm with her in the same school, her result will improve... i dun hav affections at all !! but, i think it's ok not to be with her in the same school, as long as i know i love her... and that love wouldn't change no matter what... unless 1 of us "gone"... then i think that's the end of my love life... although it's full of friendship love *i suppose* haha, but... a friend wouldn't accompany you til your whole life... it might be like 70% occupied only... where your partner will be living with you... seeing each other everyday, thinking for each other's rights, cared for each other, and stuff...
so, i chose not to take form 6, but it doesn't mean i gave up on her already... i just can't see the point why some ppl happy when i say i might wan to give up on her... somehow they got tested huh? haha.... and i remembered, she asks me to be an accountant, which is already in my list quite at the beginning, but after she said it... i guess i'll have to confirmed it... if you can do something that the person you loved asked you to... it's really satisfying... =) but the most memorable moment, is when you can cook and eat together with your loved one... it happened once in my life... but it never lasted more than 2 hours... but within that an hour and plus, i'm satisfied... to be able to cook together, preparing the ingredients, we have laughters and tears in between cause of the onion... that moment... where i can really smile from deep inside my heart... although there's so many sad moments like genting dec 2008, prom night 13th dec 2008, i dunno lar... sometimes it really hurts me through and through... which make me tears... there's a saying...
an unarmed fighter needed to be 3x stronger than a fighter with weapon
a happy moment have to be 10x better than the sad moments
as long as i treat the moonlight festival night as my superbly happy day of all... any sadness can't "tackle" me.... lolz... those pains she brought, can be replace by that 2 hours of joy of mine at that night... a friend told me, when a man tears, it means he really care.... and... that was my first time crying for a girl... in front of her... the time was 2:28am, 14th december 2008, venue i dun feel like telling... cause no one noticed i cried... they just saw those shining tears flowing in my eyes, they dunno it actually dropped out from my eyes.... 2:28,14/12/2008, the time i cried badly for the girl i loved... i shouldn't remember it right? haiz... that night, i "swallowed" a big cup of apple juice... but yet, no one knows i like apple juice?? haiz...
i heard lcci is quite good and cheap at ktar from my bro, and next day, i heard a friend of mine, su mei is taking lcci at ktar... so i guess it's ok?? but maybe i need to take foundations first?? i dun really know bout the degrees, diploma, certs, procedures, what course is what, what course is how and etc, hmm... i guess i'll have to ask around more... haha...
it's really a deep thought night... i'm even ready for the presents... nvm lar... haha... and today is the 300th day of me and her knowing each other.... such memorable day, i'm only abled to spend with my friends who dunno bout the 300th day.... haha.... but nvm lar, main person wasn't there also... so nvm lor... haha.... gosh.... i'm really self-comforting... nvm... i guess i shall stop, or else no ppl read d.... so damm long post.. hah
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